Jus woke up from my ugly slp hahas as my eyes were swollen now. Tdy wil b a start of everytink new =) found sumtink missing? yup Justine. I have deleted everytink abt him. Msn, Friendster, Facebook, Blog n most imp hp no. Not bcos i hate him or tinks lidat. It's bcos i'hav learnt to let go. Mayb tinks shld'nt even b tt way. well i jus dun hav d courage to do it in d past, but im tryin hard. Talking is cheap so i'll put dem into actions. ^^ heez... mus b wondering y out of d sudden i gt back on track rite? it all hapn ytd. n i was told by my horoscope reading ytd was my "lucky" day. But in fact i felt lyk ytd was my worst day ever, tinks cldn't hav been so wrong. I quarrelled wif my mum. she cried, so did I.(but definitely nt infront of her, i noe she wld nv wana see mi cry) so i went out of my hse. Tinkin whr i shld go, my legs brought mi to the playgrd. I sat dere long. Wondering wat hav i been doing all tis 17yrs of my life, n i realise y am i always dependen on others? i hate it. i reali hate it. Bcos whn d one im dependen on left mi, i felt so lost. Or perhaps it's teachin mi a lesson, tinks wun always go by yr way, accept the way dey are. dun b obstinate. In the end, im always getting hurt. went hm 1hr lata. Took d quiz "What kind of gf are u?" hoping tt it might tell mi whr i went wrong. Bt it turn out to be 100% perfect =.= now u noe y i say its my worst day ever. Bcos tinks jus didnt turn out d way dere shld! n den whn i see my fren result, sorry u are nt d perfect gf ... n she's in a bgr now while im broken. i doubt dere's sumtink wrong wif d qiuz. Following another "debate" occured. I dun wana say wat is it n i blive d ppl oso dun wan mi too. And tis tym round, it reali cuts deep into my soul. It jus show wat type of ppl am i to u. It dissapoint mi. For all tis long, u dun even noe mi. U noe wat? it's not everytink tt u tot is true. Put yrself into other ppl shoes. wat for do i wana do tis. THINK pls. I dunid other ppl to pity mi. I have my own pride. n from here on, sum1 called mi out. I mus say i nid to thx tis ppl. Nt only tis ppl help mi got my math done, it free mi from wat i wana run away wif. U see, aftr all it was reali a tiring day as i cld say. i wana hav a min free. Ard 6plus, my dad drove to my hse here de void deck de study corner to fetch mi for dinner at lot1. Aft dinner, went hm n came On9 agn. The story doesn't end here. It only gt tinks more complicated. As i found out d tink which i was always lying to myself. I wun say how i gt to noe bt i dun wana noe! bcos tis tym round im nt sure if im able to take it. sum1 jus save mi pls. As soon as i came to my senses, d 1st tink i can tink of is to forget him.althought i noe tt's nt possible. Thus, i started to delete everytink abt him. Subsequently, i off my com n went to bed. Tears engulf mi. When i was abt to off my phone, my sweethart, chiao zhen called mi. I can't help it but confessed everytink to her. I love u baby! At least i noe dere's sum1 in tis world hu cared n understand mi. It's d longest phone conversation i had wif her. n long b4 tis, she actually knew tis was gg to hapn , she told mi to let go bt i didnt, i kp telling myself he wld come back 1 day. Hahas sayin tis i felt so stupid n foolish of myself. I regreted bcos im hurt now. I always do my best i can in tis bgr, bcos i wun wana lose d one i luv agn. i dun wana make d same mistaken i made 3yrs back. Bt no matter how hard i try, it all turn out d same, all sayin i left u bcos i didnt cherish u. Aft i hung up d phone, i did try to slp bt u noe i can't. so i spend d whole nite crying. I cried nt bcos i noe im leaving bt to all those memorises i noe it wld nv come back. I cried nt bcos i noe i hav lost to myself, bcos i noe i hav tried my best bt tinks jus dun turn out d way i tot dey wld be. I cried bcos i reali luved him. The end .